Hearkening back to last year’s writing challenge about a “turning point,” I want to revisit: The depression that rooted in the pandemic, lifted 3+ years later on my 60th birthday while in Tanzania, Africa.
Although there were many steps along the way that contributed to the lifting of my depression e.g. medication, time away from the pandemic, and retirement, I now look carefully at the role that Taylor Swift’s music played in my recovery.
I was invited to the Taylor Swift concert and proceeded to do a deep dive into her music which included podcasts, videos, and listening to her music catalog. This journey began May 29, so when I woke up on July 30 with no depression, I was super happy about this development, but didn’t make a connection with this event and my Taylor Swift music journey.
By immersing myself in the 200+ discography of songs, I installed new so many lyrics and melodies in my brain that I drowned out/pushed out my depression demons. It may be that I just overwrote the depression demon’s shouting with a new type of brain noise, but at least this constant Taylor Swift chatter wasn’t mean to me. Instead of the demons saying negative and hurtful things, I had a plethora of fun and evocative words dancing through my brain. If words weren’t available, I had favorite melodies rushing in to fill in the space of the black hole of depression.
I’m coming up on one year of being depression-free and I check in periodically to see if the depression demons are lurking about. I’m happy to report they are benched in this game of life for the time being. I’m glad to have 31 new songs from The Tortured Poets Department inserted in my brain to refresh my list of happy thoughts.
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