My body holds memories. It’s how I remember what I wore to an event 3 years ago or what I was thinking at certain points on a car trip 5 years ago. Time and events time-stamp my body with memories. Death anniversaries wear an especially deep groove in the body-time experience. I find that accidents and surgeries have give a ragged edge as well.
Today is a year since my spine surgery where bone spurs were removed, herniated disks were repaired, and nerves were damaged. When I’ve gone to physical therapy or seen any other doctor in the past year, I had to repeat the date of the surgery often. Doctors and therapist would say things like “oh give it a year before you worry about permanent damage, you’ll get better by then.”
The magic year time mark has arrived and my thumb and index finger are still numb in a painful way. It’s an oxymoron that they are numb and are painful at the same time, but that’s exactly what they feel like.
I’m grateful that I am vertical, have my full range of motion, 80% of my strength, and feeling in the rest of my arm and fingers. We never know where we’ll be one year to next. Here’s to healing.
